


Choices

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Deathfic, M/M, Psychological Torture, The Author Regrets Everything, generally not a happy story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 11:31:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/798259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Naomi's grip on Castiel is stronger than ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Choices

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance.

_“Do it.”_

The words have been ringing in Castiel's mind for the past couple of weeks, now. He's curled up on the back seat of the Impala, hands shaking and sweaty, hair damp and sticking to his forehead. Castiel is wearing one of Sam's old t-shirts, which hangs loose around his torso, and a pair of ripped and faded jeans cling to his narrow hips. The usual suit and trenchcoat had been abandoned as soon as the fever had started. Dean's driving, fast, and Sam is turned around in the passenger seat, watching Castiel closely. Naomi's grip on Castiel is stronger than ever, and she's urging him to do the unthinkable.

 _"You're a liability, Castiel; a risk that we aren't willing to take. This –_ all _of this – is happening because of you. The world would be a better place without you. You know it, Sam knows it. Even Dean knows it."_

Castiel's body gives a full shudder at Naomi's words. The clothes are sticking to his sweat-soaked skin, teeth chattering and fingers flexing, searching.

“Cas, you're gonna be okay,” Sam says before turning to Dean, lowering his voice. “What's happening to him, Dean?”

“I don't know, dammit,” Dean all but shouts. His eyes flicker up repetitively to the rear-view mirror, catching quick glimpses of the broken angel in the back seat. His foot presses down harder against the narrow pedal, the engine revving loudly as their speed reaches higher.

“Do you think it – maybe it's a problem with the vessel,” Sam offers, turning his attention back to Castiel, whose body is curling in on itself, short gasps coming through his mouth. Sam's brow furrows. “Cas?”

The angel begins choking, gasping, body thrashing violently in the seat. Castiel's hands reach up for his own throat, eyes fluttering between closed and open.

_“Just let go, Castiel. They don't need you anymore. No one does.”_

Sam's eyes widen with horror at the sight, smacking at his brother's shoulder hard enough to get his attention. “Dean, he's – ”

Before Sam can even think about finishing his sentence, Dean's foot is slamming down onto the brake pedal, letting the Impala skid to the side of the road and to a halt. Dean unbuckles his seatbelt and flings himself out of the car, pulling the back door open and carefully tugging the flailing angel into his arms. Cas's eyes are rolling back into his head, spit bubbling between his lips and dribbling down his chin.

Dean holds Castiel to his chest as he falls to his knees, ignoring the sting of the rocks digging against his jeans. Sam stands above them both, hands clenching in panic.

“Cas? Cas, come on,” Dean barks, one hand reaching up to cup Castiel's cheek, his own eyes searching for familiar blue. “Cas?”

_“You're making this hard on everyone, Castiel. Let go.”_

_“Please, Naomi, just let me...”_

_“There's no use in goodbyes, Castiel, you'll only – ”_

_“Naomi...”_

Moments later, Castiel's eyes are blinking open, the angel leaning into the hand against his cheek. Dean's own eyes widen slightly, trying to tilt Castiel's head up. “Cas?”

“Dean...” The name comes out as a raspy whisper, and Castiel fights Naomi off as well as he can in order to focus. He can still feel it, buzzing in the back of his mind, but the more he leans into Dean's hand, the less the buzzing bothers him.

Dean doesn't say anything at first, simply offers the angel in his arms a weak smile, holding him just a tiny bit closer. “You gave us a pretty good scare, there, man.”

Castiel releases a soft laugh, head drooping back with the impending wooziness of Naomi's control until Dean catches him, holding him upright as best as he can. “I... I thought the great Dean Winchester wasn't afraid of anything.”

Dean chuckles, blinking back the sudden sting of tears in his eyes, fingertips moving reflexively against Castiel's temple. “Well, I guess now we both know that's not true.”

“Dean, I – ,” Castiel starts, eyes lulling closed for a moment before opening again. He finds his focus in Dean's eyes, hand coming up to grasp the front of Dean's jacket. “I can't...”

_"Do it, Castiel."_

The angel averts his gaze to Sam for a moment, then to the trunk of the Impala. He knows that his trenchcoat is in there, which means his angel blade is as well.

_"Do it, or I will. It's your choice, Castiel."_

“Can't _what_ , Cas?” Dean prompts, readjusting his hold on Castiel just the slightest bit. “You gotta talk to me, buddy. What's goin' on?”

Castiel can feel Naomi; can feel that incessant need to simply ask for his trenchcoat. He knows that it would be the noble thing to do; pull out the blade, plunge it into his own gut. He knows that this is what he deserves. But everything else in him wants to stay just a little bit longer, leaning into Dean's hand for just a few more seconds.

Castiel lets his eyes fall closed, and Dean's brows furrow, thumb stroking slowly over Castiel's cheekbone. “Cas?”

“Dean.”

Blinding white light comes piercing through Castiel's eye sockets and mouth, body arching out of Dean's arms just the tiniest bit. Both hunters let out a reverberating “No!”, Dean's grip holding the angel to his chest even tighter. Dean closes his eyes against the light, waiting for it to fade before opening them once again. A soft breath is drawn in quickly through his slightly parted lips, and that familiar burn has returned to his eyes, tears threatening to spill over.

The dark ashes are scorched into his jacket as well as the road, spanning across both lanes entirely in the shape of two wings. Castiel's eyes are blown wide and his mouth hangs open, body lying still and cold in Dean's arms.

"C-Cas," Dean stutters, knowing fully that he won't be getting an answer. One tear successfully spills over his cheek, paving the way for the rest to follow suit. A sob gets caught in Dean's throat as he pulls Castiel's lifeless form fully against him, embracing the angel. "Cas, please, _please_." Dean pulls away, cups the angel's face in his hands and looking into Castiel's empty eyes that once held so much behind them. "Just like in Purgatory, Cas, I need you. I _need_ you. Don't leave me like this, please."

Sam can only look on as his brother clings to Castiel's vessel, broken and choked-off sobs coming out muffled against the angel's chest. He wonders if he'll ever be able to put Dean back together again.


End file.
